I’m just going to start out, boldly & bravely going fast forward and suggest a communal aggression cage.

Point is. Norway is not the place for expressing anger. In any way.

Though, we are Norwegian, we are also human. And, aggression is a natural part of our spices behavioural paradigm. If not expressed it might build up and then KABOOOOM in a very unfortunate way.

So, now i propose this “dengekasse” (beatbox) where we all can, free of charge bash out at random strangers without causing any serious injury.

I presume it would both be therapeutic and fun fun fun.

Now, who is with me?

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Following the incriminating rise of cost for housing + electricity, a few months behind bars does not sound too bad. (photo: Pål Andersen)

Halden`s brand new gated community (prison), provides flat screen TV for every cell, window without bars & a common area where 12 lucky law-breakers share a state of the art kitchen. 

And the icing on the cake, a brand new recording studio + 6,1 million NOK playground graffiti. Lesson learned: Get rich…

or go to a fancy prison trying.

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If it stands deep inside a forest, and you have to use an axe to chop it down, then walk through a bizzard of snow for hours to get it home. (photo: Kent Jordet)

But its not under any circumstance ok to steal 97 trees from a hard working vendor, with a truck.

Thats a NO-NO!

These vandaltastic high school teatchers on the other hand. (photo: Helle Gannestad)

Just too funny!

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*Stats form Dagens Næringsliv,  March 27. 2009. (X-axis % growt)

Despite the fact that 40 % find Frank the black sheep more annoying than other commercials. 

Only 12 % find Telenors commercials annoying…

Go figure.

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Don’t want to come of as a cheep last minute shopper?

Then, buy a whole FLOCK OF GOATS!!! The present to the person who have nothing, detoured through the person who have it all.

A gift that keeps on giving…

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And we all know..

 THATs all that counts, always judge a book by its beautiful cover!

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Norway; Oslo, Ill say NO to the (economical and environmentally friendly) concept of Central “heating”. Which in fact is not much more than lukewarm water, sildering through an unattractive off-white metal wall.

When the temprature drops below zero, heat is needed the most, but the radiator, by no means HOT anymore! Useless…

NO NO NO

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This Sky-walk would without a doubt be a convenient and beautiful upgrade. (illustration: Ingrid Caroline Vaaland, Gunhild Vaaland)

Adding a bit of steel, color and speed, would bring Lysefjorden to the next level of roller coaster fun. (illustration: Rolf Aleksander Svensen Mellgren)

But wait, where is the 24h troll-wedding chapel, with rentable viking-wedding outfits?  

I guess, for those who can dream, reality will always be too far away…

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Introducing flamboyant make-up, mysterious secret service/soldier boyfriend, enormous phone bills and psychics consultations.

Kudos to you for being interesting…and get well soon, Norway needs you <3

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Experience and support the “lion woman” Linda Tucker, writer of Mysteries of the white lions at Oslo kongressenter October 8th, 5pm. Later on you can hook-up with shaman Ailo Gaup at the Unity center, where he will talk about the rare white Norwegian reindeer.

Details

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